Etiquette

Alright, I openly (and obviously I am writing this on here) admit that I am not the queen of etiquette. I frequently cut people off when they are talking, wear white after Labor Day (or is that before?). and have no clue which fork or spoon to use at a fancy restaurant (but I have only been to one like three times so I get a pass on that one).

But I do know the basics: don't wear your hat inside someone's house, don't put your elbows on the table, don't talk with food in your mouth, chew with your mouth closed, place your napkin in your lap while eating, (can you tell that we are working on table manners right now!?) etc.

There is however a completely different set of etiquette rules when you are out in public. And while in Dallas I observed some great rule breakers. Now you have to understand that lasik is an elective procedure, so you would assume that those people waiting for their appointments at the lasik office would be of a slightly higher caliber of etiquette followers. You would be wrong. (Or at least I was)

When in a waiting room:


Do NOT engage in a phone call for 45 minutes about your bodily fluids and those bodily fluids of your family members. I am greatly sorry that you are sick, but that implores the question, why are you in this waiting room talking about it instead of at home or at a family doctor's office?
Do NOT talk on your cell phone so loudly that the entire waiting room can hear (that really goes for any place).
Do NOT curse repeatedly on said phone (again, goes for anywhere).
Do NOT read the subtitles on the tv out loud. We may all be in the waiting room to have our vision corrected but we can all read, to ourselves.
Do NOT come out of the bathroom and heave a sigh of relief while at the same time fanning your posterior. We ALL know what you were doing in there and we are all trying to rid that image from our mind.
Do NOT bring your toddler and let them run around the room grabbing and licking the tables. Really?
Do NOT allow your toddler to grab my purse. I may be a mom but I can still have my personal space. I will not be held responsible for anything that may or may not happen while your germ infested monster has her hand down bag. You have been warned.
Do NOT go up to the counter 10 times to check on the status of your appointment. It's only been 15 minutes dude, take a chill pill.
Do NOT go up to the counter to flirt with the ubber cute and skinny receptionists. News flash: they're 17.
Do NOT turn the channel on the tv. There's a clearly marked sign that says so.