Death by Marker

It's no surprise that Tucker is my son. He opitimizes all the evil that is within me, x 20. He looks like me, probably will talk like me and most definitely acts out like I did/do. What's a mom to do?

So this morning while I was in the little girl's room, Tyson runs in to tell me, "Tucker's getting into your stuff mommy!" "Thank you Tyson." I walk out of the bathroom and am greeted with death by marker. I find it very interesting that it has taken Tucker this long to accomplish this feat. I have seen the millions of pictures of crazed kids and their bouts with their permanent coloring devices. But as of yet Tucker has failed to discovered this, until today.

He found my scrapbooking markers (which he has done before but somehow had never opened them) and proceeded with great care to "scrapbook" his arms, hands and face. Unbelievably he DIDN'T "scrapbook" the floor, bed, furniture and the dogs, who were watching with great joy.

In my haste to clean him up and disciple him (which is a joke because the kid couldn't care less what you do to him) I forgot to take pictures of the charade. Bummer.

I thought as a consolation prize I would delight you into a glimpse at what Tucker does on a DAILY if not HOURLY basis. Drum roll please...

Tucker:
-Gets my purse off the hook, retrieves my wallet and dumps the contents down the air vent. Then carefully rearranges all my credit cards and IDs. Lovely.
-Gets the keys down and proceeds to alert the neighborhood of our car alarm. No one has called the cops yet.
-Opens the hall closet and re-files all the beautifully alphabetized and date-organized files. This does not sit well with my OCD.
-Removes all the "squirt" bottles from under the sink and disinfect/clean/deodorize the house. And no, I refuse to put the child latches back on because they are annoying and he should know by now.
-Opens the freezer and places any and all objects near him into the Arctic. His moose is constantly in a state of "defrost."
-Helps me with laundry and pulls EVERY item of clothing off the bottom rack of the closet. And then sits on top of his bounty. You're not a pirate child.
-Again, helps me with laundry and puts all items in the washing machine and dryer and starts OR stops the current cycle. I loathe laundry.
-Evoking his feminine side, he gently pulls out items from my jewelry box and displays them on himself/floor/chair/trash. If he only knew...
-While outside, he prefers to stick to his masculineness and throws dirt at his brother, places dirt in the dog's water bowl to make mud and helps me find poo.


He's truly a delight. And I wouldn't change a thing about him. :)