Why?

Why does cough medicine taste liked aged sardine juice?
Why do illness strike the whole family and not just one member?
Why do sicknesses affect children first and then ravage the parents well after the kiddos are up and at 'em again?
Why do people give me funny looks when I call my kids "boogers?"
Why do idiot parents dress their children in shorts and tank tops in December?
Why do idiot parents still procreate?
Why does Walmart have to have a bad vibe?
Why is spanking such a taboo subject?
Why does green bean casserole smell so good?
Why am I the only person who seems to obsess about money?
Why do people still wake up at the crack of dawn on Black Friday to shop?
Why is shopping online so freakin' cool?
Why do my children only want Legos for Christmas?
Why do people think it's wrong to tell your kids about Santa?
Why do can't we play Christmas music all year round?
Why am I not a size 2?
Why do I care that I'm not a size 2?
Why do I get absolutely giddy when the checkbook balances?
Why didn't I put more effort into school and finish?
Why won't someone, anyone buy our house?
Why am I always asking why?