Rings

This week has been a weird one for me. I'm seriously not wrapped up in the MJ death or the Farrah death or Ed's death and not even Billy Mays' death (but Billy Mays? Really?). I think it's sad that they passed away and my heart goes out to their families but it's not something that I have hemmed and hawked over. These deaths have however reminded me of Jennifer's death.

Stuart and I were sitting on the couch one night this weekend and laughing at something on tv. For some reason it reminded me of the time right after our wedding rings came in the mail. We were so excited to have them; it was a physical reminder that we were getting married! So excited were we that we decided to don our rings when we went out to dinner that night. We laughed and smiled and flirted, all the while looking like we were in fact already married. I'm sure that no one else in the world noticed that we were both wearing rings but to us this was a huge magnifying glass to our hands and everyone had to know.

After dinner we went back to Stuart's parent's house. As soon as we walked in Jennifer immediately noticed that Stuart was wearing his wedding band. To say she was hysterical is an understatement. Needless-to-say, Stuart's ring was in Jennifer's possession from then until moments before our wedding.

I was retelling this story to Stuart, laughing and thinking about how silly we were.

Stuart: Oh, that was nothing. My mom was not hysterical at all.
Me: Really? I thought she was pretty mad.
Stuart: Nah, that was 'slightly concerned'.
Me: Really? I thought she kinda flew off the handle.
Stuart: Nope. You haven't seen anything.
...hmm...
Stuart: I guess you never will.

I miss her. And it's hard to put into words what that does to me.